yes, I'm obsessed

procrastination..

.. is a phenomenal way to not only publish a few blog entries, but also a chance to sit down and think about all of the things you would RATHER be doing than what you are supposed to do.
For example, instead of writing 2 research papers, working on a presentation, and reading, I began working on a monthly budget for when I graduate. Lately, I've been really burdened with the desire to pay off my students loans as quickly as possible. Their ominous and completely impossible nature has been the source of stress as I wrestle in prayer about my financial future. At a recent luncheon, a close friend encouraged me with a story of a woman in our church who had a larger loan burden than myself, who, after a short year or two of living simply with complete dependence on God, witnessed her debts disappear! Praises!
I realize that if I am to truly be debt-free after a few years, I will have to throw myself into full trust that the Lord will provide for every need. Of course this kind of dependence is necessary as a follower of Jesus, but easy to avoid. Since childhood, I have struggled for independence, and made every decision to walk my own path, however rough or straight at the time. As much as possible, I strive to be self-supporting and cringe at the fact that money is such a necessary evil.
There is a fire inside blazing to constantly experience newness and become the brave adventurer traveling around the world. There are small aspirations and hopes about moving some place exciting after Baylor and jumping into a career. Maybe moving to Austin or San Francisco, or even Chicago- places which have intrigued me since I was young.
And equally present is the bold truth that I am tied down to a debt that cannot be ignored and must be paid. There is my home in San Diego with my loving family who promises to support me and encourage me towards a life free of student loans. I think there would be great joy at moving home besides the financial help. I would be able to spend more time with my mother, who has become my absolute best friend and confidante. I would be closer to the ocean which I love so dearly. I would be able to participate in my little brother's senior year of high school by attending his basketball games, taking pictures of him before homecoming, and just hanging out. These are just a few of many reasons why moving home would be amazing.
But can I ignore the fears? Of getting 'stuck in a rut,' not finding a job using my degree, lacking a solid community of friends who really love and follow Jesus, not meeting anyone to date besides the crazies I went to high school with (silly, but it's a concern!)..
Lies from Satan can be so believable sometimes.
I want to honor God with my life, and I know this decision will play such an important role in the whole direction of my future.
Officially, publicly, and fearfully, I am dedicating the following months to praying for this decision. No matter where I am, I know I am safe in God's hands working within His will, and will remain steadfast in His love. So, I suppose location doesn't really matter. I just want to know already! ahh faith....

currently loving

1. 40 degree weather

• playing tag with my dog

3. APPLE CINNAMON Glade candle

• instrumental Christmas music

5. Audrey Hepburn and Cary Grant movies

6. scarves

• white lights

• pumpkin anything

9. reading Hebrews

10. dreaming about coming HOME in 2 1/2 weeks!!!

Texas Turkey Day

You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to you and not be silent. Oh Lord my God,

I will give you thanks forever!

Psalm 30:11-12

Even though I haven't spent a Thanksgiving at home in San Diego in 5 years, each Thanksgiving has been special in its own way. This year, my sister and I traveled to the capitol, Austin to feast poolside with our "cousins" (2nd cousins twice removed!) before driving up to Dallas for a few days to visit a good friend's mother. How neat that even in Texas we can give thanks with family- relations or not!!

THE POOLSIDE FEAST

WITH MY COUSIN NICK

NICK, LOOKING SHARP (HE DRESSED HIMSELF!)COUSIN JOE'S CLOSE UP

JOE AND I TRYING TO BE SASSY

UNCLE JOHN CARVING THE TURKEY

COUSIN MAKENZIE (ZZ) WORKING OFF THE TURKEY

ZZ AND SISTER NATALIE

the sweetest faces

These are the adorable faces of some of my kids at Mission Waco, an inner-city after school program. I work there a couple days a week and their crazy energy and loving hearts bring me joy.

-Carmischa (Mischa)-

-Corey-

-Griselda-

-Jose-

where I will be buried until Friday

meet Huck!

This week, a new addition was made to our apartment. After much debate, my roommate Jess and I decided to get a dog! (Well, technically, he's my roommates since my future location is unknown.. BUT he's basically both of ours until May).

Lucky for me, Jess is super busy with school projects and so Huck and I get to play all day together!!

Huckleberry Finn is a 9-month old retriever mix who is simply precious. Such a love bug, he cuddles and kisses like he has known us for years. He is completely potty trained and seriously doesn't bark. It's incredible.

Who would have thought the Waco Humane Society could harbor such a gem?

I can't wait till he gets his little stitches out so we can go exploring all around Waco! Adventures of Huckleberry and Jessica..

Meet my main squeeze:

Saturday night thought

"So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around?"

-Kathleen Kelly, Meg Ryan's character in You've Got Mail